In my last post the matter of falling prey to distractions came up. I’m convinced this is a major problem in today’s world and that it’s simply not well understood. However, distraction certainly ranks in the Top Ten when it comes to issues that impede our creatively moving forward in life.
Like many folks I know, I have an iPhone. It never ceases to amaze me how much time goes by whenever I use it. I find myself checking emails automatically after hanging up from a call. Why not just hang up and put the device away? Because using the device is addictive…this is what I’ve come to decide. Using it imparts a feeling of control, being up-to-date and not behind in life, a small sense of well being in a complicated and unpredictable world. But…does it also create significant distractions?
I think the electronic devices that surround us – TV, computers, smart phones – all have significant addictive qualities that often we don’t appreciate for what they are. And here’s the big question…are they helpful to us or do they get in the way of our living a better life? Are they creative additions to our lives or do they add complication and distraction to our lives? Wow, that’s a huge question!
I don’t mean to turn this post into a rant demonizing computers and smartphones, but certainly, when it comes to our omnipresent electronic devices, the central issue here is one of management, an issue of extent of use, a challenge to us to get better at saying “no” to the urge to allow ourselves to become distracted.
Let’s take a moment to look at what’s involved in permitting a distraction to carry us away. One thing I’ve observed is that we usually let ourselves get distracted when we feel just a bit anxious about the task we’re in the middle of. So, being very simplistic about it, entertaining a distraction is an attempt at reducing anxiety. I say attempt because the tension is not really reduced…it’s just put off temporarily. What can we do about this?
During a trip to Key West recently we visited Hemingway’s home on Whitehead Street where he wrote many of his most well known books. Hemingway created a writing studio adjacent to the main house over top of what served as a garage. The studio could be accessed from either a walkway from the main house or by its’ own outside staircase. What was the purpose of arranging his work environment this way? I believe Hemingway saw the importance of separation.
Our current culture seems to shy away from separation as a functionally important value. We seem to have a passion for blending, for combining things…and this opens the door for an environment full of the possibility of distractions. We take “working vacations”, watch TV while attempting to have important conversations, drive and eat (or talk on the phone). My clients tell me they take their cell phones with them into the bathroom. We seem to have a reluctance to draw boundaries around events, around experiences in our lives. Please note that distractions should be viewed as boundary violations into the endeavor we’re currently involved in. What’s the classic way to deal with boundary violations? Draw boundary lines that are designed to protect us against them!
- turn off the TV when talking to your significant other.
- drive with the radio off for the first half of a trip.
- resist the urge to “multitask” (it can’t be done effectively anyway…)
- put work away while on vacation, at least until evening.
- collect and put away cellphones during road trips, at least for part of the journey.
What I’m proposing is a mindset for viewing distractions and a plan for dealing with them. We can’t make the complications of life go away entirely, nor can we eradicate all our attempts to deal with them that have proven not to work. But we can learn new ways to think about them and new ways to deal with them. Experiment with these ideas and see what happens!
Chase E. Kneeland, M.Div. LMFT 