Take The Initiative!

So often in life we see something needs addressing – an issue requires our input, some action is necessary to fix something – but we find ourselves hesitating to step up and put the matter right.  “Let somebody else deal with it”, we tell ourselves.  The moment for action passes and we go about our lives.  We feel a bit guilty, but…

Why do we do this, and who among us hasn’t?  Many folks have been taught when growing up to “be seen and not heard”.  Others have been admonished “don’t get too full of yourself”.  Do childhood messages like these contribute to the tendency not to speak up when we become adults?  From a clinical standpoint, I certainly think they do!  Good question…let’s keep it in mind.

Often shyness plays a part in keeping quiet and not lobbying for action.  Many think shyness is something one is born with, that it’s a certain character preference, but it often gets confused with not being perceptive.  Make no mistake, it’s not the case that shy people are not perceptive…they simply are not giving voice to their perceptiveness and sensitivities.  It’s pretty clear that shy and introverted folks can train themselves to be more vocal, as long as they find in themselves the energy to take initiative.  The important thing to note here is that regardless if you’re extraverted or introverted, the common denominator is the necessity to make a decision to take initiative.

This is so important I have to repeat it – taking initiative involves making a decision to do so!  It’s not necessarily something that comes naturally.  I think all humans have a tendency to get stuck in a state of inertia, and propelling oneself out of that inertia takes energy.  It’s a scientific fact that once the inertia is broken, much less energy is required to keep the freed-up object in motion, which explains why, for instance, getting to the fitness center that first day is challenging, while after that keeping the three-days-each-week schedule is easier to maintain.  Making the decision to take initiative in one’s life operates the same way.

Far too many people wait for the other guy to address what they themselves have a concern about, then chime in.  True, doing this lets one “weigh in” on an issue, but it’s “echoing” what someone else has already said, and not nearly as satisfying as being the first to address the concern.  Personally, I try to remind myself to project energy forward every day in order to combat the tendency to sit back and not define oneself.  When I was a Township Supervisor a few years back our solicitor coached me to be the first to respond when residents asked questions of the Board.  Following his suggestion put me more in charge of the conversation and helped guide the interaction in creative directions.  It seemed like a minor matter at the time, but it turned out to be a major matter when it came to leadership and maintaining the confidence of the residents.

Lastly, let me make it clear that we lose nothing by taking the initiative.  I’ve noticed a trend that many people are getting into of waiting until the last minute before committing to a weekend event, for instance, and the motivation to do this seems to be a wish not to miss a better opportunity.  However, many times this strategy backfires since by the time people say yes to an opportunity the “tickets are all sold out”, and then they’re left out of the event.  We’ll discuss this more in my next post having to do with planning and the benefits of creating solid plans, both for the near term and also for the long term.